I feel great today. I had an amazing experience last night where I actually got to watch myself and my body struggle with each other for a few minutes. I was at a restaurant waiting for someone to show up. He said he’d be there in a few minutes, but never made it.
Thanks to my new "head space" I was able to watch my body try to get upset and go haywire, but I was able to simply watch it and stay calm and in control. I really, REALLY felt like my old self again. In control of the way I feel and in control of the direction I want to take my life.
It was like I was unwiring some faulty wiring that had been the result of the Meth addiction and trauma I have been through. It was fabulous and very calming.
I see now that my upset with others was usually my "faulty" wiring and not the actual experience I was in that was causing me the reactions I was having. Wow!
The experience of Meth, according to my Psychiatrist, rewired my brain and neurotransmitters to fire at odd times and in odd situations. I never took this as reality until last night when I was able to WITNESS my body from the SELF (my Vortex).
My friend apologized later for taking so long as we never met up. I said, “no biggie” and I meant it. Wow! Freedom! How delicious!!!!!
I am clear that I am onto something new in my life experience. It is delicious, calm and powerful. Let’s see where this goes from here…
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